This dog drives me up the wall.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m a dog person. I love dogs, and dogs love me. I love how they show you affection immediately on cue. I love how they value loyalty. I love how they each have their own little quirks.

But THIS dog, no way.

Now, it’s not exactly the dog’s fault for possessing these unruly qualities. The majority, if not all, of his problems arise from the complete lack of attention, care, and training by this family (winning one point for the ‘Nurture’ team in the endless battle of ‘Nature vs. Nurture’). He roams outside, jumps up on everyone with his long, unkempt claws, escapes to the road with unseemly ambition, and eats anything and everything in sight. Once a day, someone remembers to stuff food in a small tin bowl outside. He drinks water from the leaky hose.

As much as I feel bad for this neglected creature, I can’t help but loathe it. My one escape during the day, one that I treasure, is my morning run. Yesterday, after opening the large gate just wide enough so I could squeeze through, Vixie (said canine) pushed and rammed his body repeatedly into me so that he too could leave the cage of a house.

As I ran, tossing aside all care about Vixie getting lost or run over by a car, I realized that he was following me. This was not difficult to notice, as he ran directly in front of me, causing me to either run on the grass, or find another spot to run. He also cut repeatedly across my path unexpectedly. I almost fell twice, and then the third time he bolted straight into my right side, causing my to turn my ankle and topple over on the concrete. He came back only to chew on my shoes. I hobbled back home with a badly sprained ankle. Seriously, in more way that one that dog is a dangerous hazard. Did I mention he eats little kittens? C’est vrai, if you can believe it. I’ve seen it with my own eyes.

Despite having a sprained ankle, I decided to go to the gym. The same attractive Frenchman was working, and we flirted for a little bit (I had made sure to look cute for just this occasion) and he lowered the price by 110 euros. And that’s how it’s done.

Margarette continues to be a wonderful companion. She invited me to her house today, and told me I was welcome whenever I needed somewhere to go. She pulled out a reclining chair and I sat in the sun for a couple hours. She also bought me some snack type foods to hide in my room, as she knows that the family orders me to eat certain things at certain times. Then, she told me that she has a cell phone that I can have, and she is going to inquire about a card tomorrow at the store. Honestly, she is more family to me than that which I live with.

Today, the kids threw peas and beef at each other during dinner, gave each other the finger consistently, and shouted “ZE-ZE-OO” (which apparently means Penis and Vagina) while simultaneously making extremely sexual and inappropriate hand gestures in this regard. I felt like I wanted to cry, but instead I told them to 'stop!' and 'eat!' to no avail. Since this had absolutely no effect, not even facial recognition that I had been heard, I too the liberty of adding a few things of my own in English. Good thing they don't speak my language.

When I asked Margarette if the previous au pairs of the family had experienced the same problems (horrendous children, lonely days, lack of inclusion, care, and attention) she replied that, yes, they did. The first au pair had a great time, the second was worse, and then all the way up to me, the seventh, it’s been a long haul. She does what she can for the poor girls. I'm sure that many ex-au pairs are very greatful to her, as I most certainly am.